Blogging Volumes

Lauren is still getting used to her world. Her world is still getting used to Lauren. She stumbles where she would swoosh, stammers where she would speak, sits slowly, still unsure of how to swing a skirt over even a low bench. She still sings; music moves her the same, although "man, I feel like a woman" now sends shockwaves, shivers, spineward. Lauren gets looks. Lauren gets looks of curiosity from children, of love from those who know her, who know where she comes from; Lauren gets looks like Lauren came into the world on the bottom of a boot. A boot that had walked through a hundred miles of shit. Lauren gets looks from herself, posing back at herself, posing as herself, posing. She poses. In front of clothes-shop windows, reflection as feminine as the mannequins without heads who stare with their slender shoulders into the flowing of bodies on the street. Lauren looks at the looks she gets, lucky to get good looks or to feel good-looking and even luckier to not care. Tho

 I just don't really get it. Apparently, (though it's far from apparent to me), quantum particles can exist in 'superposition'; prior to any external interaction with them, tiny particles like electrons can flip between two separate locations in space, without ever really forming solidly in either. They could be said to exist in two places simultaneously, while never truly existing in either place at all. It appears, or at least it did to 20th century quantum physicists, that stuff only exists in a solid, binary sense when it comes into contact with other stuff. Apparently, I’m more than one gender. I’m a man, and have always been a man, and I’m also a woman (surprise!) - and, perhaps most confusingly, I’m neither. There’s my superposition - call me the Jon/Lauren particle (for, in case you didn’t know yet, Lauren is the name I’m taking to embark upon my voyage through the world as a woman). Watch me relate to the world around me. Observe me, flitting between states of